i found out late last week that there was a moment in time recently that i was cool. but i missed it. now i’m decidedly not cool again (whew!). but because of it, our kids not cool either. (eek!)
what earthshattering event could have caused this? my hairdo? my jeans? my love of pink? (oops, she’s too old too) that i watch jersey shore? (and yes, i am embarrassed)
nope. my iphone.
the latest declaration of cool/uncool came from martin fichter. who? martin fichter, acting president of htc america. er, um, what? who? (i had to google it). they make mobile phones. phones that look a whole lot like iphones except bigger. (and some are even crafted from a single piece of metal… no lie, that was a selling point) mobile phones for windows. enough said.
anyway, he declared last week that the iphone is no longer cool because old people have them. this great jewel of wisdom was culled from an impromptu survey of college kids as he dropped his daughter off at college. (he named the college either as a way to brag about where his kid was going or prove the reliability of the kids he talked to there. i am not naming said college ) (i had to google it too) the kids he spoke to were using htc phones (like he and his daughter i’m presuming) or seemingly anything other than an iphone. (i would use a free phone too if it worked like an iphone) he asked why. one kid declared she didn’t have an iphone because “my dad has an iphone”. there you have it. the death of the iphone.
(of course C has an iphone. in fact he was the first one to get an iphone. but somehow he doesn’t uncool things. i guess the final straw was when i got one. i uncool things)
i wish i had known i was cool while i was cool because i would have enjoyed it. i had about a whole year of iphone coolness that i didn’t take advantage of. maybe i would have bought one of those gigantic handbags with all the hardware and the tiny straps, or started wearing thongs or bought leather boots or said things like, “shut up” and “i die”. or even gotten something botoxed or tatooed. (not a chance)
i’ll admit, i’ve tried to be cool at times in my life but these things just don’t work out for me. i’ve got the pictures to prove it. any hint of coolness i might have picked up has rubbed off on me from being around our three kids. kids can be useful in this way. (that might be a reason not to alienate them too much while you’re raising them. you need them to come back once in awhile to keep you from completely deteriorating)
so, sorry kids for ruining the coolness of you having an iphone by getting an iphone for myself. but i’m not giving it up. the dog is still up for grabs. on second thought, we like the dog too, so you’ll have to settle for the ashes of the old dog.